The Los Angeles RAMS (Rachael, Andrew, Matt, Stephen)

After our return from Mai Tai paradise and a few days back at the old grind, Ellie and I were treated to special birthday surprise cocktails during our celebration with friends. The news of the festive Mai Tai was dropped during a game of Codenames Pictures (another surprise), though I did not know what the drink would entail. I knew that our buddies have been closely following the Expedition, so they would have a good idea of the trends that my highly acclaimed MTs follow. After our game, we were asked to play some Cap'n Toad while the secret concoctions were made. After a few minutes of surprisingly silent (apart from the occasional blender whirl) Toading, the lights were dimmed and our birthday drinks were brought over.

 

The presentation was well thought out and flawless. The Mai Tai was served in a hollowed pineapple with the most complete assortment of garnishes I've had: a full pineapple ring, maraschino cherries, a paper umbrella, a lit candle, and even an unexpected poofy flamingo straw. The ice, while having holes through the center, was crystal clear. No expense was spared for this delightful display. 

I took my first sip and was greeted by the tropical island taste sensation of a good Mai Tai. The flavor profile was spot on. I noticed initially that, while the drink certainly had the required rum-ness of a good Mai Tai, there was a distinct and tasty pineapple element. I later learned that this was one of the secret ingredients: freshly pulped and juiced pineapple. The pineapple juice really stood out as exceptional compared to those used in previous bars' Mai Tais's and really gave the drink a solid platform on which to stand. Another key feature, I went on to learn, that was unique to this specific Mai Tai was that it used amaretto in place of the traditional orgeat syrup. While I am not experienced enough with these to taste the difference in their flavors, I do understand and appreciate the importance of a Mai Tai's subtle almond notes. The drink, though containing a good amount of rum in addition to the amaretto, was smooth to drink. It had a pleasant blend of strength and sweetness that made for a crisp afternoon refreshment.

 9/10

 

Ellie's Corner

We were so surprised and excited to receive special custom tropical drinks for our birthdays! I've never had a candle stuck in a drink before but it was amazing, mine even had a cool pink-blue flame. My lava flow was delicious, with an extra hint of banana I haven't had before but very much enjoyed. I loved the straws and the umbrellas and the fruit and the coconut, it was all perfect. Eric's Mai Tai was great, although trying to switch back and forth between the sweet and the rummy was difficult, as usual. Also had a great shabu shabu dinner and received Codenames: Pictures, so all-in-all it was a great day.  

Error: failed to retrieve Pokemon Go data.

Tiki's Revisited and Final Words

After a day in the hot Hawaiian sun, I was asked where I would like to have a celebratory birthday drink. In recognition of the great 1944 Mai Tai I had earlier in the week, and because this would be the last Mai Tai experience of the trip, I chose to return to Tiki's Grill and Bar. We showed up with about an hour left of Happy Hour, which featured $5 Mai Tais.

The Happy Hour drink was not the 1944 Mai Tai, but instead the "Surf Mai Tai," which was not found on the written menu. According to our waitress, this Mai Tai contained Trader Vic's light and dark rums with a mix of orange, pineapple, and passion fruit juices. I decided to give this cheaper alternative a try. 

There was a nice skewer of the typical garnishes laying across the top of the slightly-too-tall glass. There was no umbrella, but it did have a nice dark rum float, which was a nice touch for the Happy Hour version of the MT. It had the same, acceptable, ice as before. The drink was definitely sweeter than was the 1944 Mai Tai, but was not disgusting or syrupy and did not leave too thick of an aftertaste in the mouth. The juices all tasted very fresh and real, especially in comparison to the ready-to-drink mix I tried earlier in the day. The medley was similar in composition to POG, but had pineapple instead of guava, giving the drink a classic Hawaiian flavor. The 'Tai was extremely drinkable; there was barely any rum burn. It was a bit more like drinking a glass of juice than drinking a typical potent Mai Tai, likely related to the cheaper happy hour price. While it was a really nice and refreshing afternoon treat, it did need more rum to contend with the island big boys. The Surf Mai Tai was, overall, a great drink for the price and exceeded my expectations for their cheaper alternative, proving, again, that Tiki's truly is Mai Tai champion.

8.5/10

To add a maraschino cherry to the top of my expedition cocktail, I decided to conclude it with a final Tiki's 1944 Mai Tai for the table while the sun began to set over the horizon. The drink came in a pint glass (I know, but I can look past this because of the more-than-redeeming qualities of the drink) with a beautiful lilikoi foam and signature mint sprig. I stirred in the foam and passed the drink around the table. It was literally finished in less than 2 minutes with everyone agreeing that it was a delightful and potent Mai Tai. Having it again solidified my opinion of this being the best Mai Tai iteration on the island.

Below are the comprehensive results of my expedition:

Thank you so much for reading my blog. In tasting these Mai Tai's, I have seen what makes or breaks this type of drink and will attempt to make the perfect Mai Tai at home.

Ellie's Corner

What a whirlwind of emotions this Mai Tai Expedition has been. On the evening of Eric's birthday and the eve of mine, it seems the perfect time to finish. With 2 final Mai Tais today, both of which were delicious, especially the 1944, it tied a nice bow on the end of the experiment. I had a Blue Hawaii during the happy hour, which tasted extremely blue. Today I listened to the faint strains of the Pokemon theme song through the door connecting us to the next unit, which seems like a nice send-off experience. It's been fun to have this little corner to myself, and if Eric reviews any future Mai Tais, I'll figure out something to write about. We learned during this trip that "Maita'i" means "good" in Tahitian. So thanks y'all for reading. Maita'i Night, and Maita'i Luck.

 

Trader Vic's Mai Tai Ready to Drink Cocktail

On a whim, we bought a bottle of Trader Vic's version of the ready to drink Mai Tai. The drink tasted much fruitier than the Koloa mix - it was reminiscent of the island favorite POG (passion - orange - guava). The rum was barely recognizable; the drink almost tasted non-alcoholic. The flavor was in line with how a Mai Tai should taste but it certainly did not have the signature strong rum presence. All in all, it is a better choice for a premixed MT than the Koloa mix, but is still not a sufficient substitute for the real deal.

3.5/10 

Buzz's

Ellie's parents took us to Buzz's, an offshoot of Waikiki's Duke's, on the East coast of Oahu for an early birthday celebration. Aside from the delicious food (I got the tender teriyaki steak and the hefty salad bar), the place offered a great beachfront atmosphere and a thorough libations menu, the latter of which caused some me some dilemma. The featured drink, as expected of the island restaurant, was their Mai Tai which, based on their description, looked to be pure rum. They also served a BFRD (Big F-----n Rum Drink), which was the same Mai Tai but with added pineapple juice. Our waitress told us that the BFRD was so potent (more than 3 ounces of rum) that they only allow 3 per customer. I was not sure which to order, since the BFRD sounded more like a traditional Mai Tai, but I did want to try what they feature as a classic Mai Tai. The waitress offered a wise solution: the Mai Tai with pineapple juice on the side to add as I please. 

My first impression of the Mai Tai was that it was more similar to a Long Island than a traditional Mai Tai. It was extremely powerful and rummy but, somehow, did not leave a burn and was decently drinkable. The drink seemed to be more or less a medley of rums with what I believe was lime juice to provide some acidity. It was a good, strong, rummy drink, but did not have the fruity flavors associated with a Mai Tai. I then mixed in half of the small glass of pineapple juice. I was amazed at the difference in flavor such a small amount of pineapple added. It instantly transformed the rum mix into an island Mai Tai. The juice was very sweet and most likely freshly squeezed from locally grown Oahu pineapples. I tried a sip of Mattea's BFRD for comparison, and found that it was borderline too sweet; I preferred my half-juice MT. With the juice mixed in, the half-BFRD was a great Mai Tai. The only thing missing was the orange flavor, which I was able to look past. It was definitely the strongest I have had yet; I felt the Buzz by the end of it, but still kept the nice and beachy Mai Tai flavor profile. For the sake of curiosity, I tried squeezing the extra lime slice into the drink, which definitely took it away from its island flavor. The Mai Tai was served in a perfect glass with very nice, clear ice chunks. The garnish was pretty lacking, however, as I had no fruity treat to enjoy at the end of my drink. Instead, the drink offered a solo, out-of-place lime slice.

8.5/10

 Ellie's Corner

Buzz's was great, delicious food in a beautiful atmosphere. Eric's Mai Tai was truly originally a pure rum drink, which did somehow have that Long Island-y effect of softening the alcohol. It was a little hard to taste the different pineapple juice mix-ins because my Lava Flow, in contrast, was super sweet and creamy and made the Mai Tai taste like diesel in comparison. I also had a lychee martini afterwards, surprisingly strong but still drinkable, and I had a decent Buzz as well afterwards. Today I caught a Goldeen for the first time, so casually!

Return to Mai Tai Bar (Ala Moana)

Ellie's family touched down while we were back at the Ala Moana center doing a little bit of shopping. We decided to meet up and have a drink there so we looked at our options: the Pineapple Room in Macy's, Bubba Gumps, Islands, or the Mai Tai Bar. After looking at the Pineapple Room, which was empty and sadly looking onto the parking garage, we decided the best option was to go to the local and great Mai Tai Bar. Because I had already had the Traditional Mai Tai, I decided to give the Mango Mai Tai a try. Ellie opted for the Icy Mai Tai, which promised an alcoholic approach to the classic Hawaiian shave ice.

The presentation of both drinks was exactly like that of the previously reviewed Traditional Mai Tai, so I will not go into details. The mango Mai Tai had a flavor very similar to that of Mango Nata de Coco (the sweet Korean treat with floating mango coconut jelly chunks). The drink was, surprisingly, not too syrupy and was a crisp delight on a hot Hawaiian afternoon. As good as the cocktail was, however, it did not have the distinct flavor profile of a Mai Tai; it was more of a good mango drink with rum than a Mai Tai with a mango twist. As far as Mai Tai's go, this falls below my expectations. I only got through a few sips before Ellie offered to trade me for her more Mai-Tai-y Icy Mai Tai. 

The Icy Mai Tai tasted very similar to the Traditional MT. It definitely had more of a Mai Tai flavor than did the mango MT and the rums were more strongly pronounced. It tasted a bit less of orange juice and had a bit more pineapple, but the overall profile was about the same. Because of the icy-ness, however, it was a decent amount more drinkable and refreshing. It was a good mix of palatability and strength. It was a bit disappointing that the drink was like any bar's blended cocktail; it was just Mai Tai ingredients blended with ice. The drink was not the alcoholic version of a traditional Hawaiian shave ice promised by the menu. Overall, it was very similar and offers a good, more refreshing alternative to the Traditional Mai Tai. 

Mango Mai Tai: 5/10

Icy Mai Tai: 7/10

Hawaiian Shave Ice for reference:

Koloa Hawaiian Mai Tai Cocktail

We spent the day at the Polynesian Cultural Center in northeastern Oahu. The center did not serve alcohol in a supposed effort to honor the Pacific Islander tradition, though we believe the true reason has more to do with the fact that they are funded by the Mormon Church. Regardless, I was unable to purchase a Mai Tai.

We did not feel like going to a bar once we were back in Waikiki. However, I was still able to have my daily Mai Tai thanks to Kauai's own Koloa Distillery. The ABC store at the base of our tower sells the ready-to-drink Koloa Hawaiian Mai Tai Cocktail. A quick stop by the ice machine and I was all set.

The first thing I noticed while pouring the drink was that it let off a grossly strong sweet aroma that curiously resembled Hawaiian Punch. Upon drinking, the Mai Tai was distinctly harsh, leaving a strongly alcoholic aftertaste, despite being as sweet as a breakfast syrup. The mix tasted as artificial as its bright yellow color would indicate. There was no hint of any actual fruit juices or other real ingredients being present. Other than the thick syrup, the flavor of which more closely resembled tat of Kool Aid than of an actual Mai Tai, the most noticeable and lasting aspect was the rum. The quality of the rum was good enough, had it been mixed with the appropriate ingredients, but, in this drink, did not leave a pleasant aftertaste. This drink is to a Mai Tai what a Hungry Man is to a home cooked ribeye steak dinner.

2/10

 Ellie's Corner:

The Polynesian Center was amazing, with a river canoe island dances pageant, fire dancers, coconut frond weaving, and a luau. The only thing it was missing was the alcohol. But for me, unlike the reviewer on TripAdvisor who said "no alcohol, no fun!", it was not a necessity. Our virgin drinks inside a coconut and a pineapple were just fiiiine. The Koloa Rum bottle was seriously just like a small bottle of rummy drink mix. Today I saw a tiny fruit stand with a hand-painted sign with a poke ball that read "Come Catch Some Shave Ice."

Cheeseburger Beachwalk

While eating dinner at the Cheeseburger Beachwalk in Waikiki, we noticed a very strong claim on their Tropical Drinks menu: "Maybe you've had it on the beach, or at your hotel, or at the luau, but you haven't really had it until you've had it here! Our made-from-scratch MAI TAIS are World Famous!" We also noted that these famous 'Tai's were greatly discounted during the nighttime happy hour.

We strolled around the streets of Waikiki and, when the happy hour struck, returned to Cheeseburger to try their Mai Tai. I watched the bartender pour 3 various rums, 2 juicy looking things, and a rum float into the glass and was excited to taste the outcome. The Mai Tai had a great presentation, complete with a tiki cup, pineapple slice, maraschino cherry, and umbrella. The ice was a weird pyramidal shape, but okay enough.

The taste, however, fell short of my already mediocre expectations. The rums were a notably lower quality than those I have grown used to having and gave the drink a somewhat unpleasant aftertaste. In retrospect, I am unsure that the "juices" I saw the bartender pour were actual juices. Instead, I think they were Mai Tai mixers of some sort, as the drink tasted pretty syrupy and fake; I did not taste fresh orange or pineapple juice. I think this is an acceptable Mai Tai, especially for a restaurant bar, but it is far from meeting the outlandish claim made by the Cheeseburger menu writers. It is a mediocre Mai Tai that will do in a pinch, but had nothing that made it above average.

4.5/10

Mai Tai Bar (Royal Hawaiian)

After some busy days shopping and exploring, we had ourselves a relaxing day on Waikiki's scenic beach. After a few hours of sunbathing and swimming we left to escape the heat with a refreshing island libation. We headed straight for the Royal Hawaiian's bar, which has tempted us with its outstanding view of the beachfront and Diamond Head peak. Though we passed by and admired it every day, we hadn't noticed the bar's perfect name: Mai Tai Bar (different from the one in Ala Moana). We took a seat on the sandy patio and looked over the bar's extensive Mai Tai selection.

I chose the Royal Mai Tai since it seemed to have the least amount of variation from a standard Mai Tai (other than the 1944, which I decided against on account of having Tiki's version last night) and because it is named after the hotel. I was especially intrigued by this Mai Tai as well because it features Lahaina rum (I have been eyeing the bottles of this Mauian rum in every ABC store we see but had yet to actually try it).

The presentation of the Mai Tai was off the charts. The drink sat in a perfect highball glass with a full embellishment of a pineapple slice and a maraschino impaled by a mini umbrella with a lime slice on the side in front of a beautiful ocean background. My only complaint is that the ice, which was in the shape of cubes with craters, was surprisingly clowdy considering the prestige of the Royal Hawaiian.

My first impression was, in all honesty, a bit disappointing after I was so impressed by the look of the drink. The Mai Tai was bitter and sour which would be great if it had the necessary accompanying sweetness. Similar to Tiki's, the RH Mai Tai Bar did not rely on the juices and instead seems to use mostly rum and Curacao. The issue here is that these rums do not blend as smoothly together, leaving a pretty strong straight rum flavor with a bit of residual sour/bitter from the juice and Curacao that is present. It was, however, not as sour as the Ala Moana Mai Tai Bar's and definitely more palatable and refreshing. I did taste some pineapple juice, but wish there was a bit more to cut some of the bitterness of the rum. The Lahaina silver rum was very prevalent in this MT's flavor profile and, unfortunately, was not the smoothest to drink. The most interesting part of this drink was that it had a weirdly distinct smokeyness which I can only imagine came from the rum(s). All in all, this Mai Tai was definitely drinkable and actually pretty tasty once I adjusted to its more sour flavor profile.

8/10

 Ellie's Corner:

The Royal Hawaiian was pretty much exactly the bar experience I was looking for, as on-the-sand as is legally possible while drinking. I also ordered a Mai Tai this time (I know!!) albeit a blended, extra fruity one. It was kinda minty, like a Maijitai (get it?) and it came with an extra shot of dark rum to put on top (I added it and I still liked it!). Eric's Mai Tai was pretty good, although every time I took a sip of it I felt like I was eating ribs because it really tasted smokey, like BBQ. Wow, as I was writing this I realized I had no Pokemon Go experiences today so I opened the app for the first time since we got here and found out our hotel is on a PokeStop so I should probably start playing more while we're here. I also see a Cloyster nearby, so I should go get it.

Tiki's

After spending the day in the car driving around the coast of Oahu we decided to walk to one of the restaurants we most enjoyed on our last trip: Tiki's. As I recall, it was a toss up between Tiki's and Brennecke's (on Kauai) for the best Mai Tai 2015.

Without hesitation, I ordered the first item in the "Tiki Top 3": the 1944 Mai Tai. The menu image revitalized my fond memory of the strength and complexity and of my enjoyment of the Mai Tai. The image had the drink in a pint glass which, to me, did not do it justice so I instead chose to upgrade to a souvenir tiki cup (I also wanted the cup in honor of the Expedition :D).

The drink that was delivered to the table was wonderfully presented, many thanks to the tiki cup upgrade. The tiki aside, however, the drink was very appealing with a sprig of mint and a delightful passion fruit foam. I was able to look past the lack of fruit due to its exceptional, albeit non-stock aesthetic. The ice was the cylindrical type with a hollow center; acceptable but not ideal.

As I took my first sip, my eyes literally closed in a moment of culinary bliss. This Mai Tai was great. It had notably sweeter notes than previous 'Tai's, but still had a small punch of tartness. I could feel the rum in the back of my mouth and throat but it was a pleasant sensation rather than a powerful burn. The flavor profile was similar to that of Mai Tai Bar's but not as robust. Everything was a little more subtle, but in a good way. I noticed the strength of the rums but somehow was not overpowered by it. While this is likely related to the quality of rums used, I think the orange Curacao is partially to thank for this as well; by introducing more liquors, I believe the drink has a long island iced tea booze cancelling effect.

Tiki's Mai Tai was, however, less crisp and refreshing than my precious MTs. While the sweetness of the Curacao and passion fruit foam mitigated some of the drink's bite, it also left a bit if an unfortunate thickness in my mouth.

All in all, this was, without any doubt, the best Mai Tai I have had on my early expedition. It's flavor profile and presentation is in a separate league from the previous contenders. The ability to blend such complex flavors in such a way to create a strong yet surprisingly palatable cocktail without the reliance upon overpowering fruit juices puts Tiki's a step above the rest. I will be hard pressed to find a better Mai Tai on Oahu.

9.5/10

Ellie's Corner:


Forget what I said!! Being disgusting should not be a sign of a good Mai Tai. Tiki's Mai Tai tasted like a Mai Tai but wasn't gross and sour and too strong like Mai Tai Bar's. It was definitely strong but like in a good way and I think I could drink a whole one. Which I didn't do this time, because I was having a "Five-O Lava Flow," their iteration of the strawberry Pina Colada. It was so good and tasted even better because it came in the tiki cup. I chose the blue one, which technically is called "Blue Creativity" but in my mind I christened Tiki Todd. Today on the inside of the door of my toilet stall at the Polynesian Cultural Center there was a flyer extolling the virtues of Pokemon Go and advertising that they had a PokéCenter.

  

Mai Tai Bar

As Ellie and I strolled through the Ala Moana shopping center, with swimsuits and cookies in mind, we came across an unexpected treat: Mai Tai Bar. Of course, this was too perfect to pass up. We took a look at the menu, which consisted of 4 different Mai Tai's. We noticed, too, that the Mai Tai gods blessed us with a generous, well-timed happy hour. 

I chose the "Traditional Mai Tai" because it is still early in the expedition; I do not have enough foundation in the standard cocktail to start introducing flavor variations. The Kraken spiced rum stood out as an interesting ingredient and I was curious how this would play with the other rums and juices. 

The first sip was definitely less palatable than was that of the Cuckoo MT. There was a distinct sour element, which I have previously associated with Mai Tai's, that I believe stems from a not-so-sweet orange juice mixing with the rums. The Mai Tai Bar's MT was more in line with my flavor expectations. Whereas Cuckoo Coconut's' tasted primarily of spiked pineapple juice, the Mai Tai Bar's had some of the missing elements to create a more complete feeling drink. Also noticeable upon the first few sips was the strong presence of the rum. My thought is that this is because of the inherently stronger flavor of the Kraken. Whether this is necessarily bad is up for debate, as a good Mai Tai should be a considerably strong drink. The drink was still crisp and refreshing, but the sourness did hold it back from being as smooth to drink steadily. The MT was pre-shaken without a floater and was served in a pint glass which, while a step up from the plastic cup, was disappointing because it didn't seem like the right choice for this tropical drink. Although it included a nice, color-contrasting orchid, it did not have any additional fruit garnishes or umbrellas. The ice was high quality, clear, and chopped into reasonably-sized chunks. Overall, this was a pretty good example of a Hawaiian Mai Tai. Though the sourness was a bit unpleasant compared its sweeter Cuckoo counterpart and its presentation left something to be desired, this was a solid Mai Tai that lives up to being the namesake of its bar. 

7/10

  Ellie's Corner

Mai Tai Bar was an amazing find on the second day of Eric's Mai Tai Expedition. My thoughts on their Mai Tai: disgusting. A classic sign that it's a good Mai Tai. Way too strong and a bit sour. I had the much more palatable Passion Fruit Mojito, which was deeeelish. I just love that we're somewhere where you can just walk into a place and they have a Passion Fruit Mojito on the menu, let alone for 5 bucks. I also got a new bathing suit and we went to the zoo and saw an especially great Fennec fox, penguin, elephant, and chimps, along with a bunch of other sweet animals. Today I saw an old man playing Pokemon Go in Japanese on his phone while waiting for breakfast. 

Cuckoo Coconut's

Welcome and thank you for following my journey to taste and compare the Mai Tai's of the island of Oahu.

The original comparison point for my Mai Tai ratings was going to be North Hollywood's Tiki No. Unfortunately, I have lost the footage of my original rating, but I can recollect that the 'Tai was certainly sub-par. It consisted of what tasted like pre-mixed syrup and mediocre rum; it had very little actual juice and fresh ingredients. This was not fit to be my standard of comparison for Hawaiian Mai Tai's. More like Tiki No Way.

Enter Cuckoo Coconuts. As Ellie and I looked for a place to grab lunch during our first few jet-lagged hours, we stumbled upon the "last authentic tiki bar in Waikiki," according to the violele player. We ordered our food as well as what will now be the comparison point for my island Mai Tai's.


 

The initial sip had a very strong pineapple flavor. I realized shortly that I needed to stir the rum floater in more thoroughly. After doing so, the drink had a distinct dark rum flavor that was prevalent but not overpowering. There was a good mix of pineapple and rum, but, unfortunately, these were the only real noticeable flavors. The drink did not have the fake, pre-mixed element of Tiki No's, but it did seem one-dimensional. Though it lacked the more subtle aspects of a great Mai Tai, Cuckoo's drink was very palatable, fresh, and crisp. The 'Tai had my ideal of the perfect ice: large and clear chunks. The pineapple slice was superbly ripe and has raised my expectations for future slices. However, while the pineapple was great, the drink did not have a maraschino cherry or a paper umbrella. It was also served in a plastic Solo-esque cup which was slightly saved by a cute coaster-holder, but ultimately hurt the drink's aesthetic. Overall, I think that this is a good starting point for my Mai Tai expedition; Cuckoo's was a solid drink that I would order again, but did have some room for improvement. I will consider this my average when rating future MT's.

5/10

 Ellie's Corner:
Cuckoo Coconuts was great. Super sweet Tiki aesthetic. I tasted the Mai Tai and I thought it was pretty good, a little strong but not too bad. Very pineapple-y. While Eric had his Mai Tai I sucked down a Tiki Tango, which was coconut rum, gin, and mango juice. P great. We also had poke and loco moco, which were both real good.
Other notes: I forgot to play any Pokemon Go today but I did see a guy playing it on his big old iPad while his wife rinsed the sand off her feet.